A Life Forged in Endurance and Grace
In every sacred space, there is a story—of how the timeless touches time, how the formless takes form. The story of Bhavani Sakthi Peetam is not one man’s alone, but a divine call that echoed through a life, shaping it, breaking it, and revealing its sacred purpose. It is a tale of unexpected grace; what seemed like an end became a profound beginning.
My journey began not in search of a higher power, but in search of an exit. From my earliest childhood in a modest farming family in Tamil Nadu, I carried an inexplicable grief—a deep, unspoken sorrow that often felt larger than this life.
This sorrow made me feel like a stranger everywhere. Laughter around me felt distant, like echoes from another world, and I often retreated into solitude. This profound sense of alienation became my constant companion.
From an early age, I was exposed to deep knowledge through literature, puranas, and epics. I knew by innate nature about karma, dharma, birth and death, and their consequences. As I grew, I turned to the structured world of logic: engineering studies and a career in software development.
Around the age of 24, I had a vision of building a grand nano institution to alleviate global poverty, inspired by Madan Mohan Malviya. But the universe follows its own logic—one that doesn’t yield to human plans.
At 26, that divine code ignited in me, and I endured a terrifying inner fire where my body, mind, and identity unraveled. Physically, I walked the thin line between life and death; the extent of the damage to my body seemed beyond recovery. The suffering was colossal: imagine taking all the moments of pain in a lifetime and combining them into one single day—that was the intensity. My whole body, every muscle, was burning and extremely painful. I could not sit even for a moment without extreme pain; everything—sitting, standing, walking, and sleeping—was agonizing. Just the very act of being was extremely painful. It felt like hundreds of lifetimes of karma were converging and burning through in this one life only. After that, I didn't even desire to live; I didn't think it was worth living in that body.
At some point, when death looked inevitable, I planned to go to the Himalayas to shed my body quietly and far away from anyone I knew. Yet, grace didn't allow me to go.
In return for that profound grace, I made a simple but non-negotiable vow: Since I was held here, this life would be dedicated entirely to the service of others. This experience defined my courage: I now serve no one but the path of truth, and I do not go against dharma. I am not scared of taking risks; I will take on any problem head-on because I truly cannot go down further—what else is left to lose in this life?
With survival came an exhaustive quest for healing. I visited what must have been more than 60 medical institutions in Hyderabad, Bangalore, and Chennai, carrying a bag full of reports—yet doctors were utterly clueless. After countless tests, Dr. Mohandoss at MIOT in Chennai ultimately advised me to stop wasting money, confirming no one could diagnose the issue. I still remember him telling me that day: 'You can go anywhere in the world, use any advanced medical facility, but no system right now can diagnose a problem in your body, because every possible test has been taken, and the parameters are ideal for a healthy person.' Yet, only I knew the burning inside. I still wonder how I am alive and often share with a few people that I am not supposed to be alive. I abandoned allopathic treatment once and for all.
My focus shifted to other forms of treatment: ozone therapy, Chinese reflexology, acupuncture, Siddha, Varma, and various other alternative therapies. Nothing worked. I never attempted Reiki or energy manipulation, instinctively knowing that touching my karma directly would be catastrophic.
I was willing to go through the excruciating pain—like my body was burning—and refused painkillers. It was then I realized a profound truth: we can share many things in life—happiness, material possessions—but when it comes to dealing with our own karma, pain, and suffering, no one can do anything. One must simply go through it, as the person right next to me, including my friends and family, had no clue what was truly happening to me. This crystallized a sense of life purpose: you can live whichever way you want, but when the final moment comes, when death arrives, no one will be able to help. My only goal became to exit the physical body on my own terms. I decided I was not going to die; I will choose my death.
Following this realization, I came to the path of Yoga. I did a program in Art of Living and began practicing Sudarshana Kriya. Slowly, combined with traditional Siddha medicine, my body started recovering from the worst state to about 40–50% recovery. To fuel the medicine expenses, I started working again to fund the medicines.
Then, I began traveling to sacred sites, mostly Shiva temples in places like Chidambaram and Kumbakonam. One day in the Chidambaram temple, I experienced a profound meditative state. This was a realization that this experience was something no amount of effort could achieve, but the energy of the temple was able to do that for me.
My entire approach to temples changed that day, shifting from praying to the Divine to experiencing the energy space itself. My quest then changed to seeking temples which are energetic and lively to experience meditation. I would follow no specific process; I would simply go to the temple and sit near the sanctum to experience that unique inner state.
However, I could not fully accept the Guru of that tradition, and my quest for my true Guru was still on. Not knowing who my Guru was, I was exploring many traditional ashrams. I visited Ramakrishna Mutt in Mylapore, Chennai, regularly participating in evening satsangs, as my office was nearby.
Then, a friend insisted I attend an introductory talk for an Isha Yoga program. I told him I was already practicing Sudarshana Kriya and was busy, but he was adamant, saying he would only participate if I came. I attended for him, but continued my existing practice afterward, as the quest for my Guru was still on.
In January 2014, I came to attend the In the Lap of the Master program. While going back, something was playing out in me that I knew this was the place I had to come back to. By June 2014, I came to the ashram and stayed.
I had spent all my earnings on medical expenses or supporting my family. When I came to the ashram, I had a zero balance in my account. I immediately withdrew my PF and used it to sustain myself for the years I spent there.
My inner nature is such that I wouldn't ask anyone any favor. I did not want to touch temple money for my own expenses, so I never took any financial support from the ashram. Eventually, the PF money was also gone, and I lost interest in fixing my health issue. I was tired and frustrated, to be precise.
After a few months, a new drive came that I had to fix it, that I shouldn't lose hope. I borrowed some money from friends and, trying to fix my health issue, started going negative. To fix that, I borrowed more and lost it in the stock market. There was a point when I realized that being in the ashram, I couldn't handle the situation and needed to go out.
Through all these years, every connection I had—my family and friends—was disconnected except for one friend. She was always there for me when I needed it. When I isolated from everyone, she was there for me, and when I needed a laptop while in the ashram, she sent one from the US. When the construction got stopped because of a fund crunch, she helped to restart it.
This friend, truly a Mahalakshmi, offered me her brother's house in Saravanapatti, Coimbatore, where I stayed, exploring my next move. I didn't want to return to a mundane 9-to-5 job. I started traveling—a completely unplanned, ruthless, and brutal form of travel.
After witnessing how little care was given to providing good food in many spiritual destinations, I felt a good meal was necessary for the seeker, and I decided to provide it.
This led to the opening of Sanghamitra Restaurant, intended to be a friend to the spiritual community. My true vision was to build a spiritual community—an Ashram for Liberation, and I planned to succeed through this business to fund the foundation.
Without knowing the nuances of the food business, I got into it. By the time I figured out the operations, I realized Sanghamitra would not be a profitable venture, so I closed it.
By this time, I knew where I could get free stay and food across India, and my plan was to visit such places after closing the restaurant.
In December 2021, I was coming from the Himalayas and reached Coimbatore. As I was traveling towards the ashram, I suddenly experienced the mountains and fresh air in the morning and decided: I am not going anywhere; I will stay here only.
Then I took up freelancing with Novvum. I met Rohit, the founder of Novvum, through Tripti, a friend, and he offered me a position. Though my contribution was minimal, this was the turning point to secure the land.
While staying outside the ashram, the house owner grew irritated, questioning why people visited and why I wore saffron. I felt that since I didn't have my own property, people were taking me for granted. This experience crystallized my purpose: to set up a place, not just for myself, but for people like me who have nowhere to go, no one to depend on, who are orphaned or don't fit into society, so they can find refuge.
Once I decided to build a place for the community, I started looking for land. The moment of commitment was absolute. When I gave the token advance, I had only ₹10,000 in my account—money donated by a friend for my personal expenses. I hadn't earned any money since 2014 and was in deep debt by then. I hadn't even drawn a salary from Novvum. I withdrew that ₹10,000 and gave it as the advance.
It was a miracle. I don't know how it happened. It was the cosmos arranging all necessary funds. Support came from many people; they are all part of this journey. In just three months, the land deed was completed in May 2022.
As soon as the land was secured, I became restless to start construction. Now, if I look back, I would say I was crazy to start such a project without any money and a proper plan, but it was perfectly executed. I planned to begin construction immediately in August 2022.
Incidentally, Rohit’s parents, Dayakar and Devi Maa, came to India and met me. They wished to see the land. Rohit shared that I was building something like a community. They returned to the US and told Rohit to give ₹10 lakhs to start the project. This formed the foundation of the large construction effort, and support poured in from many unforeseen places.
The land cost around ₹40 lakhs, and the construction eventually shot up to ₹1.2 crore. At one point, I was as low as ₹28 lakhs in debt. The sheer scale of the project was like a tsunami that swept away my past struggle. The transformation was stark: I went from someone who occasionally preferred staying on a train because I couldn't afford a place to suddenly owning a farm with a beautifully built courtyard. Now, this Bhavani Illam will serve as the launching pad for this monumental project. The grace continues, with the Nagarani herself residing in the courtyard.
After construction, new financial challenges emerged again. To address these and support seekers chasing liberation, I envisioned establishing a spiritual community: Bodhi Space.
The intention was clear—to build a community of sincere aspirants, united in moksha. Learning from Sanghamitra, I proceeded cautiously, fully understanding business aspects before further investment.
But the real estate world demanded manipulation, fraud, and lies to survive. The purpose of serving seekers was compromised, as even those seekers struggled to trust.
I realized this path was not mine. Truth and integrity could not be compromised for infrastructure. I dropped Bodhi Space as conceived.
Letting go of Bodhi Space marked the end of business-centric spiritual solutions. I resolved to dedicate myself wholly to pure service.
My vision became a foundation providing wellbeing in its purest form, free from commercial trappings.
This required integrating Ayurveda, Hatha Yoga, Tantra and ritual, and Art as spiritual expression. Such a synthesis offered a genuine path to liberation and healing.
This necessity led to the establishment of this sacred space. My immense suffering, which had haunted me for years, drove the final motivation to set up a place that could heal deep-rooted problems. When I was going through my pain, I had no one with this kind of comprehensive knowledge to guide me out of it. This deeply personal experience is the core of our unique offering to everyone we connect with.
This place must be devoted to absolute truth. We will not take shortcuts, sugarcoat the truth, or hide anything; we will use plain speak. This is why we are establishing a research center—because the kind of issue we are dealing with is unheard of or unresolved by many systems in the world. We are not promising a cure, but we will be able to identify the issue and at least tell you that you may have to live with some of your issues.
We do not want to set up another retreat center; if something doesn't work, I would simply walk away and never continue. This is not a place for corruption or partying; we really mean liberation—nothing more, nothing less. I have taken immense karma already, and I don't want to take more and come back in another life. This dedicated space, therefore, is truly a Muktisthala (Place of Liberation).
I knew that Ayurveda and Yoga alone would not solve the core issue, and the Ritual aspect was essential for true, complete healing. This understanding is what led me to meet Naga Temple Swami Ambotti Thampuran, and from there, the story took a completely different arc.
This dedication is meant to destroy all kinds of poison in one's system—not just physical, emotional, mental, and karmic poison—to liberate individuals from their suffering and move them towards ultimate liberation.
The Puranic narrative, known across the Hindu tradition, speaks of Sati Devi, the Mother of all Goddesses, and her consort, Shiva. When Sati's father, Daksha, organized a great Yagna (sacrificial ceremony), he deliberately invited everyone except Shiva, intending to insult him. Unable to bear this profound disrespect to her husband, Sati attended the Yagna and, in her grief and anger, immolated herself, sacrificing her body to defend Shiva's honor.
Overcome by sorrow, Shiva retrieved Sati's body and began the Rudra Tandava, the cosmic dance of destruction, threatening to annihilate creation. To save the universe, Vishnu used his Sudarshana Chakra to cut Sati's body into pieces. Where these fragments fell to earth, sacred sites of immense energy were established—the Shakti Peetams.
What was once myth is now becoming reality in my life. To be in this experience—knowing that Sati's tapas (penance) is concluding and that She is coming to take Her seat—is truly spectacular, a cosmic phenomenon unfolding in the present moment. I am now living a story that has been told in the Puranas and is coming true.
The story of Bhavani Shakthi Peetam is the unfolding of a profound mission: to heal, to liberate, and to restore sacred order. This vision is realized by bringing back the legacy of Nalanda—a center of higher learning where timeless wisdom is made practical and actionable.
We are establishing an Ayurvedic and Siddha Research Institute at Bhavani Shakthi Peetam dedicated to deep, unresolved problems where all other systems have failed.
We seek to recreate the legacy of Nalanda—a center of higher learning where wisdom is practical and actionable.
This sacred space is devoted to inner transformation, serving as a place for Dhyan (Meditation) and ultimate liberation.
I still haven't fully realized how I got drawn into this mission. I feel a great sense of responsibility given to me by the universe. I don't know the exact connection between myself and Sati, or why I am in the middle of this mission. But my obsession was always Moksha, not just for me but for people around me, trying to establish a space for liberation. Now, Sati, in the form of Bhavani, will liberate once She comes. Mystical experiences with Nagarani and Bhavani are already being witnessed by a few people.
Now, I feel a profound sense of purpose within me; I am peaceful and feel completely at home. This is not my personal mission, but Shiva Himself willing Sati to come out of Her tapas (penance). He will ensure the success. This time, it is fated that Sati, in the form of Bhavani, takes Her seat precisely at the foothills of the mountain where Her body was dissected, establishing the ultimate center of Liberation.
This dedicated space is truly a Muktisthala (Place of Liberation). The vision is to establish Sanatana Dharma, the timeless universal principle, a place of Healing and Learning the Hidden Truths, Mastering death, Maya, and Time, and knowing the Human System inside and out—all with absolute purity, integrity, and utmost devotion.
Anyone who carries a controlled fire within themselves can come and join this mission with me. I deeply wish for wiser, more capable, and more powerful people to join, who can elevate this vision to another level.
The establishment of this Muktisthala fulfills the highest mandate: Bhavani Shakthi Peetam, the New Origin Path, is the living shrine where Sati Devi, the Mother of all Goddesses central to Hindu tradition, takes seat in this space in the name of Bhavani. In this living shrine, the Divine Mother, once denied, descends to heal, to liberate, and to restore sacred order.
If you feel the call to contribute to this monumental work, you can reach out here: Contact Us to Join the Mission
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